Initially, I will say the loss of my Angel Girl ignited an enveloping grief that was so overwhelming; it paralyzed my thoughts into a single, tunnel vision focus. There is no doubt this was crucial as I processed the unexpected heartache that had fallen upon me. I believe this process will follow me the rest of my days.
As I began and continue my journey through this sorrow, it became evident that the word “I” took the lead on most if not all of my self-correspondence. “I wish this…” “I want that…” “I will miss another…” The “I’s” had it so to speak. I do feel this is necessary, and vital for memories and what was to come to be brought to the surface and my loss to be deeply realized on this side of heaven. But, at the same time, it limited my belief in the promise of Angel’s eternal home.
2 Corinthians 5:1-5 gives a clear picture of our temporary home and the promise of our true home.
1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. 2Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, 3because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. 4For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.
Be assured, there is nothing I would want more than to have my sweet Angel Girl here with me to hug on, laugh with, and just gaze upon…I dream of it daily. But, she has shed her earthly tent and is now heavens above this physical plane. So with my selfish “I’s” now exposed…I have come to know that Angel has found her eternal home.
Dear Lord, I pray that as I reminisce of what was and what I hoped would be, you remind me of what is; that my Angel is with You in her true home. Please lift my selfish thoughts as I come to know and embody this truth. Amen.
May God Bless You and Give You Grace.