For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. (Jas. 1:3-4)
There have been several times on my journey in which I have felt tested. Many of these times I did not equate faith as being the central aspect of what was on trial. Most of these times I was blatant in the assumption that it was all about self, be it pride, ego or self worth that took the blow. I now know that it all comes down to faith.
It may seem strange to some, but when God allowed Angel’s earthly journey to come to an end, anger never entered into my process. I found myself falling to faith. I had to make sense of MY unimaginable. The only way to grasp what happened was to have constant conversations with God – it is not that I received the answers, but I gained comfort.
This comfort allowed me to realize that God has the ability to soothe my sorrows. If he can bring calm to my soul in times such as these, I know that he has the power to bring resolution to any and all situations. Though I must be diligent in my endurance and allow patience to be my strength, I know in the end, God will rest His comfort on me.
The sadness I have in my heart for my Angel Girl still exists. God did not remove it. It has become part of who I am through God. It doesn’t define me, rather allows her to live within me always. This is what falling to faith has brought me, and I KNOW going forward as life’s tests arise my faith will endure.
May God bless you and give you Grace!